How to survive the betrayal?
The answer to the question of how to survive the betrayal lies in the question itself - to survive! Just live by finding an interest in life that is not related to the person who betrayed you.
Who can betray?
Betrayal can be perceived as such only from a loved one - a loved one, a husband. The betrayal of a friend or girlfriend, we do not evaluate as "the end of the world": betrayed? Well, the flag to him (her) in his hands! "In stock will give new!" But the treachery of a loved one, a beloved man, or a legitimate husband, we perceive very hard, even tragically, almost like the destruction of the entire Universe.
Why is this happening? Because as a result of the betrayal of a close person, our trust in him is trampled down, which was a guarantee that a woman is not alone, she has a reliable rear behind her back - a person she can rely on and trust him. Awareness of the fact of betrayal leads to the fact that a woman instantly feels lonely and invaluable. The world collapses in her eyes, existence itself loses all meaning,her best impulses of the soul are thrown into the dustbin, and the trust, which was worth a lot of effort on both sides, is trampled and trampled into dust. Total devastation takes place in the soul, which seems to chill the insides.
Who is to blame and what to do?
Psychologists give advice on how to survive the betrayal of a loved one: to understand why this happened. The author, who writes these lines, is not a psychologist and does not accept such advice. Attempting to understand the reasons for the behavior of a loved one who betrayed you, can lead to the depths of self-digging, which can stretch into "everlasting eyelids." "Why did the one whom I trusted betray me?", "What did I do wrong?", "What's wrong with me?", "Am I bad?", "I'm not beautiful?", "I did not satisfy him in bed ?! " - endless questions that have no answers, because they are asked to themselves, can lead to severe depression, aggravating an already difficult situation.
Understand the causes of what happened, of course, necessary, but you can not look only for his guilt, and you can not look for an excuse for the person who betrayed you. The betrayal of a loved one is always mean and treacherous, because it is always unexpected.It is important to remember that you trusted, but your trust was not appreciated. The person who betrayed you may try to justify himself, he has that right. But only you yourself should decide on the continuation of further relations. And do not dare to look for your fault in the causes of betrayal - you do not have to “bend over” under the circumstances that the traitor himself created, because of his own weakness or stupidity.
How to survive the betrayal of their own?
So all the same - how to survive the betrayal of a loved one or husband? The main thing - you can not go into yourself and in useless self-digging! The first thing that is simply vital is to understand yourself, calmly and correctly setting your life priorities. What is most important for you in this life? A family? Career? Children? House? And now, calmly, without hysteria and self-pity, you need to determine the place of the person who has betrayed you among your life priorities. With it you can create and, most importantly, save the family? Is he able to support you professionally? Is this the person from whom you want to have children, and most importantly, to bring up your “hope and support in old age” with him? He can be trusted to build your fortress - at home,who is designed to protect you from total indifference of the world? And the most basic thing: is it possible for a person who has betrayed once to be trusted with the most valuable thing - life itself, sharing with it not only joys, but also burdens?
Only by answering all these questions, one can understand how to survive the betrayal of a husband or loved one. After all, every situation is individual, and every woman is unique. Here it is categorically impossible to give general advice, because only the woman herself can decide whether to continue the relationship with the person who has betrayed her or break them once and for all, thereby opening up for new relationships in the future. Is it worth it to forgive or better to forget about the betrayal of the one whom she trusted unconditionally, along with the traitor himself.
In such a situation, the most important thing is to keep the faith in people, the belief that there is one who will not betray you under any circumstances. And to preserve this very quality of the soul - the ability to trust. The weakness of one man should not poison your life with distrust of another, which will surely burst into your life, "tearing the roof off you", and infuse your soul, without leaving the slightest doubt - it is worthy of your trust, because life goes on.
Therefore, I repeat - the betrayal of a loved one just needs to survive. Tearing at the soul of pain will pass when you realize that "everything passes. And this too will pass" and "everything that is done is only for the best." Time heals everyone, and everything and your situation are no exception.